What do you Say?

What do you say when someone says "You've changed my life." or, "You have inspired me to be a better person and I am really grateful to have met you." Well, thank you, of course. But from there I'm not really sure. Those two statements were told to me this week by two seperate individuals and it got me thinking.

I don't necessarily do real well when people encourage me or tell me things like mentioned above. I feel like my role in life is to be doing the encouraging, not receiving it. However, through a friends challenge, I have begun to let myself hear these things and not excuse them away. If I'm honest about it, when I hear those things, I don't feel deserving of them. And on the other side of that, I don't want to become prideful about myself. It's a delicate balance between the two alternatives.

What have I done to make someone think that their life has been changed by me? Well, as I think about it and go back to my thinking about my spiritual gifts...I am good at being with people, encouraging them, and sharing in their life. I'm not afraid of hurt, pain, taboo things, difficulties, etc. In fact, I find myself talking about those things more easily than surface things like the weather. I have been gifted in this area and that is unique to me, there are people that can't do that. I journey with people in life. I don't have alot of close friends for a reason. I want to be able to be intentional and meaningful with the ones I have. So, if I refuse to hear the good things I'm doing in people's lives, in essence I feel as though I'm denying the blessing that God has given me. I'm not fully allowing God to develop His plan and His purposes in my relationships and work because I don't think I deserve it. Well, it ain't about me and I need to allow God's perspective to blow open the box I've put him in and be willing to say "Here am I."

How have you kept God in your own box and limited His abilities to work through you?

As I was discussing these things with a friend the other night I began to become aware of my realm of influence. People are watching me and observing my life. This could be intimidating, it is certainly humbling for sure. But I was challenged to think of that as a motivating factor over my life. Because of these people, I can strive to live my life with purpose, meaning, genuineness and discipline. Without this silent accountability, what would be the point? I would be doing things for myself and not sharing the lessons and life that has been given to me. I have, and will continue, to make mistakes. Big mistakes that brought me to my knees and smaller ones that kind of just flick me on the head. Those mistakes that I'm going to make are my reality. I'm not perfect. But my heart would be, how do I respond and act when I do make those mistakes? I think people are watching for the mistake, but what may surprise them is how you respond. I hope that in my attempts to become real and genuine that I have shown people that there is hope and always a second chance in life.

How have you opened yourself up to allow people to watch your life?

So, I say thank you. And I don't take those statements lightly that are told to me. I have things coming up in my life that could expand this level of influence --beginning my therapist position at the beginning of the year and beginning a Celebrate Recovery program at our church this year. These things will allow me to do what I've been called to do, and I personally feel like I'm good at (and I shouldn't be ashamed to say that). It's an exciting time with lots of room for growth. Life is an exciting ride and I hope that I follow the path of meeting people where they are and being passionate about giving some level of hope and power back to people.